What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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