we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
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