Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
