So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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