saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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