I want to have your abortion
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
