There is no way he is gay with that hair.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
