yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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