either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
