I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
