i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
