For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
