So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
