love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
