No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
