Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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