was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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