Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
operation harelip BJ is a go
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
