My brain says no but my pants say off.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
