What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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