I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
