is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
