I cannot find my penis.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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