Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
