found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
