it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize