That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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