May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
