Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
