woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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