Swine flu. Run for my life!
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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