Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
