Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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