I CAN MOONWALK!
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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