U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
