So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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