Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
