is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
