I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
