Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
The best revenge is premature balding
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
