so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize