The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
don't judge my taste in strippers
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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