I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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