I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
