U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
