Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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