Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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