can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
