your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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