watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
